Commitment

I have been thinking a lot about what I should be doing while here on earth. I know I need to serve my God, be a wife to my husband, and to teach and train my children. I know I should be kind and love others. But just how do we do this? I think the first thing we have to do is understand commitment. We can know what we should do, but then we have to be committed to do it. I am afraid I have fallen way to short in that category. I see so much I need to do and could do. I even want to do it, but I am always stumbling and falling.
       Recently, I was feeling very inadequate about reading my Bible, teaching my kids, and being the wife I should be. As I prayed and desired a better way, God opened the doors up for me. First he gave me an idea to find a good friend I could pray with every day. I new I could not go to a friends house everyday, so my idea was skype. We set up a time early in the morning while our family was still in bed, and we began to pray. Second he sent another friend to call me and in our conversation she said one thing she did with her kids was start there day of home schooling with bible reading. I began starting our day with a time of Bible study. This is an area I have tried to keep going either with us all reading a portion together or me reading and teaching, but I have fallen over and over. I would try to get the kids to find a time to do this own there own and I would work to find my own time, but I never said, “ok, for this first 15 minutes we are reading the Bible”. We have began setting the timer for 15 minutes and we all read and jot notes. Everyone reading where they are at in the Bible. At the end of the 15 minutes. I ask each child to share what they have wrote. I was amazed at the things they wrote, how much better our day would go when we did that. I was also amazed at how much God began to show me in his word. He really started to convict me of the things I should be doing.
         Another thing God showed me was that I need to be fasting. I have fasted in the past but never stayed committed on a weekly basis. My grandmother lived a good long life and before she died she told me that she had always fasted one day a week. I thought about that and how healthy of a lady she was and how she always seemed so sweet and always loved God. My friend that I pray with in the morning also felt she needed to be fasting too, so we set Thursday to fast. Having a friend to share, pray, be accountable to, and confess to has helped so much. I know God says were two or more or gathered there will I be. He wants us to fellowship with others so that we can all learn and grow.  Fasting has given me a time to clear my mind and focus on God.
       He also put on my heart to share some of the things that have benefited me, with other ladies. I have women all the time want to know how I do what I do. I have been judgmental at times by thinking they are just being nosey and busy bodies, but I realize there are some who really want help, just like I do. That is when I decided to start this blog. I don’t know if this has helped very many. A few have put comments on face book. Please leave comments if you have benefited from this. 
        He also has shown me how I should be a committed help meet to my husband. I have always wanted to be “the good wife”, but my husband just wouldn’t let me. I mean, how could I when I had to deal with all of his issues. I spent time trying to help him keep his things put up and cleaned up, and I spent time reminding him of the things he had on his to do list, but he would often seem to get frustrated with me. As I read through Ester the Lord started convicting me that Mike was my king. Alena would say, “I am a princess and daddy is the king, but I didn’t feel like his very good queen. During this time I went to a ladies meeting and she talked about Ester and how she was chosen to be the queen and she found favor with the king. I thought, “the king had so many women to choose from so why did he choose Ester?” I think she must have been very pretty and took much consideration in the way she looked and cared for herself so that she could present herself to the king in a very desirable way. She had much wisdom in what to say and what not to say. She even fasted before going into her king to discuss important matters. WOW. And I thought, “he was not even a king that really deserved a wife like that,” but she was a committed woman. I was feeling very convicted. The Lord is helping me see daily how to compliment my husband. I was realizing I can make him or I break him. I started to pray that God would give me wisdom on how to make my man complete. They do need us to make them complete. And God can give us the wisdom if we have the commitment.

       The area I have had to really deal with is commitment. I start things and then fall away. I get frustrated with myself instead of just picking up and going again. I was reading in Proverbs and it said a just man will fall seven times and rise again Proverbs 24:16.  He knows I am not perfect so he sent his Son for me. I can go to him daily and confess my sin and pick up and go again. I know there must be others out there who are the same way. All of us who have walked toward God know the path is so beautiful and the outcome is rewarding. We know that when we fall back Satan takes control. We know our flesh is easily controlled, so we must walk in the spirit of God daily, seeking him. Let us stay committed to the things of God and let him direct our path.
Bonnie